


Pulled My Trigger, Now He's Dead

by VibrantVenus



Category: Scream (Movies)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Grief/Mourning, Haircuts, Healing, Trauma, bohemian rhapsody by queen, title is from a song
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-07
Updated: 2019-10-07
Packaged: 2020-10-13 16:30:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 603
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20585558
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/VibrantVenus/pseuds/VibrantVenus
Summary: Sometimes she misses him. Wades her way through the hurt and anger, to the soft aching part of her that misses her friends.





	Pulled My Trigger, Now He's Dead

**Author's Note:**

> This probably isnt good but I had fun so NYEH

She tries to ignore it for as long as she can, but sometimes-sometimes she misses him. Misses all of them. Wades her way through the hurt and anger, to the soft aching part of her that misses her friends

It's easy to pretend at first. To push down all the years and years they'd been friends. To pretend that Billy Loomis and Stu Macher were just two strangers she'd met briefly. Two comets entering her orbit, and leaving just as quickly as they arrived.

It starts with Tatum. 

She's trying to-to deal with her grief in a healthy way. Trying to deal with the lies and the betrayal and-

_how long was it a lie?_

It starts with Tatum. With blonde hair and blue eyes. Her skin, her arms, the way her body dangled from the garage door-

She cuts her hair. 

It's 3 am and she's trying to be quiet, trying not to worry her father-but there's an urge, a _need _to change.

To become someone new.

It starts with Tatum.

It's not as hard as she knows it could be, not as hard as she knows it will get. She finds...moments, memories. A sense of peace in the few little things she can salvage, the nights at her house, the friendship bracelets they made in the 7th grade. 

Next is Stu.

She tries to think of the good first. Tries to-to decipher when exactly it had changed. But mostly she tries to remember the good. To sort out her memories in a way that make sense.

Stu was funny. Was kind. Was only occassionally insensitive, was mostly well-meaning. 

She can't connect that Stu, the old Stu, to the dead one. One half of Ghostface.

_"What's your motive?"_

_ "Peer pressure...I'm way too sensitive."_

It's hard.

It's hard, but it's not nearly as hard as it is for Billy.

Billy is worse. 

Billy is worse....because Billy _makes sense._

She doesn't like it, doesnt understand why she's so hurt. 

Thinks maybe this is how he felt when his mother left.

And isn't that the worst part? 

Mothers, her mother specifically. 

She tries not to think about it. Tries to pretend there isn't a part of her, small as it is, that blames her mother.

She knows that at the rnd of the day, Billy and Stu are responsible for their own actions. Didn't have to kill people. Didn't have to kill her friends and family. Didn't have to do any of it.

It makes it worse somehow. It's almost easier to pretend it was her mother, than it is to acknowledge the fact that Billy and Stu were just...two dead people she didn't recognize anymore.

Two people lost in their own sick fucking game. 

Two people she'd trusted.

Two people who had so desperately wanted to hurt her. 

For a while she avoids Randy, avoids everyone. Knows that they're all going to want to _talk _about it. 

And she's just-she's not ready for that. It's one thing to come to terms with her new reality. It's a different thing entirely to discuss each gory detail for people who didn't really care. 

She goes to their funerals. Stands in the back, far out of sight. 

She doesn't linger.

She says her goodbyes, and leaves and-

It doesn't change anything.

Billy and Stu are still dead. Still the two assholes who completely changed her life. Still the two undisputed villains of their story.

Just two horror movie monsters that were suppossed to be her friends, suppossed to care about her.

Just two strangers wearing the faces of people she thought she knew.


End file.
